Wednesday, January 23, 2008

We have waited so long.............


For Turkey to have this. Sibling interaction. Last night I had Rollie Pollie in a Bumbo seat and he looked at Turkey and SMILED. Turkey was tickled pink of course and Husband just beamed at me from across the room. His eyes said "OMG! Did you SEE that??". Indeed I did. Turkey never got that from our sweet Isabella. Of course, Turkey did have the most amazing bond with Isabella, but it was very different from what is going on between he and Rollie Pollie. They are brothers and I simply cannot wait to watch them grow together. Amazing stuff, it truly is.

Well I am yet again at a crossroads in my life. You see I have A.D.D. when it comes to deciding what I am going to do with my life. My purpose I guess. I have such a hard time deciphering what is my own voice and what is God's voice. What does God want for me and from me?? I haven't listened to His voice in the past and have paid the price. I am really trying to learn what the difference is. I'm stuck on a decision......a major one. It has to do with working, making money and time away from my kids. Decisions decisions. First of all, let me just say that I *hate* being away from my kids and could never work Mon-Fri and have them in daycare. I just can't do it. (I also don't think it's right.....but that's another story and would obviously irk some working moms out there.) It's just my humble opinion, that's all. SO, my big decision. I can right or I can plunge and go left. Which way does God want me to go? I have no idea.....and I don't know how to find out. HELP! It's times like this when I want to just call my pastor and say "Hey, can you figure this out for me? You talk to God right?" Oh, if only. I'm sure he'd have some encouraging and insightful words for me, but he wouldn't tell me which way to go now would he? God just needs to come have a cup of coffee with me so we can chat......you know about my career choices, why my daughter had Lissencephaly, OH and why she had to DIE. You know, typical coffee talk............

Well, I have to go clean, do laundry, play puzzles, yell, enforce time out, sweep floors, wipe butts, inform certain three year olds that he cannot put his wee wee on little brothers head (I'm not naming names here.....) you know, my mommy duties. I am *so* underpaid. ;)

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